I was out of town for 3 days for a memorial service, a Celebration of Life. see post: He Will Be Missed Forever Back home, as I was sitting on my couch reflecting and thinking about how I could even describe the many emotions of a lovely time of healing with childhood friends – my 6 month old kitten, Grace, caught my attention as she looked out the window. She was studying something intensely that was in the tree outside. With out moving, I searched every branch of the tree and for the life of me I could not see what that kitten was fixated on. Slowly, I tiptoed to take a closer look. Finally – there it was sitting on a flimsy twig. It was the smallest, most dinky hummingbird that I have ever seen and he was just sitting there on that dinky twig. And he sat and he sat. I have never seen a hummingbird sit quite so long. Kitten didn’t move. Dinky hummingbird didn’t move. I didn’t move. It was all profoundly mesmerizing. And with that, Dinky flew away like a shooting star.
I returned to thoughts on my weekend. It was a beautiful and healing service that touched me deeply. Needless to say, it was bittersweet. The reception that followed truly was a celebration of my friend’s life. And as we all ate incredible food and others had wine, the stories began. It was a special gathering and I felt so blessed to be there. I noticed I was full of many different emotions, but I found myself to be quite comfortable in my own skin. However, my goodness, I still think there is something so lovely and elegant and cool and sexy and beautiful about a swirling glass of wine. (sheesh!) I smiled to myself as the love and affection started to warm the room. These people are normal drinkers! And I was loving being with my life long friends. Laughter with healing tears. So real. Yet, surreal because one of us was not there.
As planned, six of us girls stayed at an elegant hotel with an ocean view. It was one of the girls big brother who had passed away and we were all about the love. The next morning after a big breakfast in the hotel restaurant, we walked to the boutiques to do some shopping. All of us have children but I’m the only mom who’s child had moved out and graduated college. As we all talked about what to do next – here’s what was different for us – we all confessed we wanted to go back to our hotel and watch a movie together in one of our rooms. And that is just what we did. We sat together for over 2 and a half hours, without speaking, watching a good movie. The love was all around our childhood girlfriend who’s big brother had passed away. It felt right. And like that dinky hummingbird sitting on a tiny twig, it was simply time to “be”. Sit and be still. Be comfortable. Sometimes no words are necessary, but sometimes, just being there, and sitting, is.
A special thank you to my mother for the pencil drawing of the hummingbird and also to Brian (an important friend since childhood) for sending me the picture of the ocean at sunrise. Posted with permission.