The clock is ticking towards the new year. As I sit quietly at my desk the only sound I hear is the soothing hum of my small heater as it warms my toes. It’s 34 degrees here in Southern California. Brrr! I’m wearing both jammies and sleeping clothes – a few layers are a good thing tonight. The sounds of the fireworks in the distance are coming from Magic Mountain. So, it’s official. It’s midnight. Time to say sweet dreams to 2012 – I’ve learned a lot from you - but your work here is done now.
Welcome to my life 2013 . . .
Right now I imagine that the volunteers in Pasadena, California, are quite bundled up as they painstakingly place flower after flower and blossom after blossom on their individual floats for the famous Rose Parade. Many will be both excited and weary as they will be working nonstop until sunrise on New Year’s morning. (Bring on the hot coffee!)
Last month I visited my dear friends since childhood who live on Orange Grove Blvd. As I was exiting the Pasadena fwy, directly in front of me I could see that the bleachers were already set up for the parade.
Every year they majestically sit on the corner of Orange Grove Blvd. and Colorado Blvd. This is where most of the T.V. cameras are and professional crews take pictures of the exquisite and larger than life floats, horses and marching bands. (I gotta thing for marching bands!) I grew up going to the Rose Parade every year with my childhood friends and my next door neighbors. It was the late 60′s and 70′s and it was quite safe back then – every one was joyous and thrilled as they camped out on the sidewalks and lawns and watched the mini-pre-parade of pedestrians blowing noisemakers mixed with the sound of genuine laughter and joy. I am especially fond of the year my father took my brother and me to the parade and magically, my father found a spot on the curb for the 3 of us to sit as we snuggled close to each other to keep warm in the early morning. Many of my childhood friends will be at this special parade tomorrow.
And once again, my beautiful friend Barbara has invited me to spend the night at her childhood home and go to the parade with her. And once again, like last year and the year before, I must graciously decline her offer. My heart silently breaks. I long to join her on the walk down memory lane. My instincts tell me my body is not yet ready for such an adventure. In the same moment I can feel my emotions find a balance - I have surrendered to a healthy level – I have accepted the fact that, physically, I will not be up to joining her this year. Yes, acceptance is one of my most powerful prescriptions for the many layers of health challenges with Fibromyalgia. I will be just fine at home watching the parade on T.V. as I am sipping my hot coffee while I feel warm and cozy as I cover up with my soft and thick blanket. I call it my “hugging blanket”.
It’s time for me to drift off to sleep now. But first, I am compelled to give thanks and say out loud to the universe how much I appreciate the loving help that I’ve received from my dear friends this year. Having friends can make being under the weather for a very long time more bearable. Health challenges have not been fun. I know I am blessed, for my friends have carried me far when I’ve been at the breaking point. My friends have seen clearly when I was too frail and exhausted to see for myself. Yes, I am blessed. In a soft whisper, I say to myself many times a day as I do right now, ”Because I have loving, kind and helpful friends, I am truly blessed. Thank you God.” And I am blessed to know that my friend Barbara will ask me to go to the Rose Parade with her again next year – because that’s what friends do – they don’t give up on you.
2012 is over and gone now, but my authentic friends are here to stay. I needed to learn that lesson this year.
Welcome to the family 2013, you’ve finally arrived!
Good health, comforting sounds and loving words my friends,